Happiness is...

Can I just say one thing? Ben & Jerry's Light Phish Food.

OK, one other thing. Chocolate Light Ice Cream, Gooey Marshmallow, a Caramel Swirl & Fudge Fish. (I'm reading the description right off the carton, which is close to empty.)

Now that I've talked a little about how much I've been enjoying Israel, let me just say it's missing something really really important: B&J's Light Phish Food. And now that we're in Chicago, my ice cream muse and I have been reunited.

I realize that Israel is a sort of serious place in the eyes of the world, and tends to be a lightning rod for a million controversial issues. We're not going there right now. We're keeping it shallow, like most of us are in our daily lives. Sorry, no offense. I include myself. You and I both probably care about a few shallow things every day. And day after day, there's no Phish Food in Israel.

Now, there ARE lots and lots of other extremely yummy things to eat. In every supermarket there are about 400 kinds of cheese. Some kinds are even broken down into cow, sheep and goat's milk versions. Also, hummus is not a "dip" sold in little lunch-size containers, it's a staple and you can buy it by the half-gallon. Pita is real pita. Not the sad, flat flying saucers you get in stores here. The produce is fabulous. Great domestic wines. On and on.

But there are no graham crackers. No canned pumpkin. No Cool Whip. No Wheat Chex, or 400 other kinds of cereal that have been invented in recent years by American chemists. A lot of the processed foods that have made America great just haven't made it to Israel yet. Importing is expensive and maybe not every Israeli loves these things as much as they should.

Nadav's mom has told me about when they first arrived in the mid-'80s and the supermarket situation was bleak. For Americans, anyway. They had something called American Day once a year at the store. Then, you could buy peanut butter, marshmallow fluff and other exotic delights. Most of the time, though, you had better learn to like lentils.

On that note, I'd like to commend Israeli supermarkets for now carrying a bazillion items they didn't used to, like Heinz ketchup (without which Nadav cannot eat a hamburger), Oreos, Post Bran Flakes and even caffeine-free diet Coke. If we had moved here 25 years ago, I wouldn't be writing a post on a blog about it, I'd be tied up somewhere in a padded room overcoming the symptoms of food detox. (Yes, I know...25 years ago there were no blogs either...OK.)

I'm only slightly embarrassed to tell you that when we moved here, or I should say when John Deere moved us here, we brought a nice little stash of supplies that cushioned our landing. Brownie mix, Trader Joe's Light Vanilla & Almond granola, canned pumpkin (for Thanksgiving pies, for crying out loud, even if there's no Thanksgiving), molasses and other stuff that would keep on a shelf for a while and stave off homesickness.

I was also slightly embarrassed to open our pantry door when company came over, but it did make me very warm and happy inside to know it was there.

Since then, my dear husband has hauled I don't even want to think of how many pounds of powdered, boxed, canned happiness during his/our various trips back from the Shopping Capital of the World to keep me from getting sad or bitchy. I am not quite sad or bitchy enough to suggest bringing Phish Food on dry ice.